Saturday, March 2, 2013

Giving Yourself Credit


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Being 18 days away from Spring and all, I thought my abandoned-for-the-last-month-blog could use a little bloom. I mean, what mom of three young boys doesn't just love the constant cold and wet days of winter? {sarcasm}
Something simmering in my mind over the last month as been how poorly I view my performance most days.
This isn't a long, ginormious insightful post, but I hope you see the tiny bloom of insight I share here in the winter of your days. If you wrote down every single thing you did all day, instead of only staring at the things you didn't, you'd give yourself a lot more credit.
I wake up with a ridiculously unrealistic mental list of important things to do. Seek Jesus, and do my very best all day to lovingly attend to the hubs & kiddos while crossing things off. Laying my head on the pillow at night, I exhale with a few groans all the [seemingly] giant things I didn't get finished.
All the while, never really giving myself credit for the things I did get finished.
If every kiss, hug, smile, "attaboy" was recorded.
If every comfort, cheer, praise, challenge was recorded.
If every prayer whispered, scripture confessed and discipline given was recorded.
You'd see a list of a lot of wonderful ways you accomplished things that day.
If days weren't valued by loads of laundry put away, and dishes dried or meals cooked. But whose value was found in the monopoly money of playdoh played, crayons colored, and paint splashed with little persons given straight to you from our big God. You'd feel more accomplished.
Not in the wiping, straightening, rinsing, and folding, but in the hand in hand and eye to eye connection.
"I see you running soo fast"
"I see you jumping soo high"
"I see you helping your brother"
I see you.
I promise you our God's pleasure is rooted in seeing your children and not just serving them. Although important [they have to eat right?] we shouldn't give ourselves such a hard time when things to-do remain. Because the truth is every day will bring dishes, laundry, dirt on the floor, and toys scattered. But you only have today to see him jump that high---in that very moment. You only have today to tickle her toes at 151 days old. He has a story he wants to tell you about right now.
Write that down.
1. Listened to his story of driving on the moon
You can't cross it off a list, because you didn't know it was needed or would happen that day. That is the joy and excitement each child brings each day to us. Something we will do, that we had not planned on.
2. Lingered longer at the changing table cooing back at her
Give yourself a little more credit for all the things you do all day, and give yourself a break for what remains, for it always will.

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